Cottage in the Woods – Friday Fictioneers – 09/07/12

Image courtesy of Piya Singh (Bittercharm)

Enrique and his wife, Sadie, had walked for hours in overgrown hills and meandered off course. While lumbering through granite rocks and muddy sludge, traces of honeysuckle lit the way to a new path. Once they chose it there was no turning back.

The cottage appeared before them as a mirage with the delicate trickle of water coaxing them closer. They dropped their packs and splashed their faces with cool liquid and drank.

They could rest tonight. Inside a candle burned and a small, feathered bed awaited them. Sadie sighed. The door slammed shut, locking them in. The candle extinguished.

Advertisements

34 thoughts on “Cottage in the Woods – Friday Fictioneers – 09/07/12

  1. I like the structure of your piece – the hint of something sinister in the first paragraph, the feeling that everything will alright for them in the middle section and then the sudden realisation at the end that it will only finish badly. Nice

    Like

  2. Oooh….wonder what happened after the door shut and locked. Sounds like the basis for a horror flick. Nice imagery…you took me from an idyllic nature scene to something sinister and then left the rest to my imagination. Good job.

    Like

  3. Huh, I could have sworn I left a comment a minute ago, but since I didn’t get confirmation, I’ll try again. I love the concise writing in this piece and the dramatic flair you gave the ending. I wonder exactly what happened when the lights went out. Well done!

    Like

    1. Hi Boomie. Thank you. It was a really good writing exercise for me. The word limitation definitely forces you to make some choices 🙂 I want to continue doing these. Thank you so much for turning me on to this group.

      Like

  4. I think they should have been wary of the candle and the featherbed. Don’t they watch any horror shows?? That type of thing is always too good to be true. 🙂 Nice job with build-up to the horror.

    Maybe there’s a WordPress glitch going on. My email said I had a comment to moderate (and showed me the comment) but it hasn’t shown up on my post in over half an hour. Creeeeeppppyyy!

    Like

    1. My computer is glitchy too. Creeepy!! This is actually the fourth time I’ve to send this message. Plus, I know we’re not the only ones. Hmm….I hope it’s not my story. It’s possessed WordPress. Thanks for your nice comments. I’m going to send this before it’s too late….

      Like

  5. Oh..oh…Wonder why the feathered bed and candle did not give them a clue and send goosebumps. It was too inviting.
    ps: I agree re. WordPress glitches this week. I’ve tried leaving many comments which would not take, so gave up. Previous to this, I tried sending one to Carrie…5 times….to no avail. I’m hoping this one works.

    Like

    1. Hi Lora. I’m new to the Friday Fictioneers. I’m so happy with the response and comments people have given me. Thank you so much for reading. WordPress seems to be a little better lately. My computer, however, is on the blink.

      Like

Take it away.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s