I want to know why

Amy Reese,

Dear readers, I am seeking answers. I need your help.

I want to know why when I take medicine with a measurement cup all the lines on the cup are faint and fuzzy. I mean the lines are practically invisible. If you’re the one who is sick and having to pour your own medicine, this is especially irritating. If they don’t want people to have the improper dose, at the very least, they could make some thicker, darker lines for us. Am I right? Why won’t they make lines and numbers we can see? Deeper indentations on the cup don’t count.

Take you medicine
Where are the lines? Is it some special code? I want to see thick, dark lines with big, dark numbers. How hard would it be?

I want to know why the grocery store where I shop thinks it’s perfectly befitting to separate the cookies and the crackers. Isn’t it common sense that they be placed in the same aisle? Cookies and crackers belong together. There’s a cosmic shift when I enter the store. Something is just wrong there. Why must they insist on keeping the cookies and crackers apart?

I want to know why Donald always looks so pissed off. Quit your lip smacking, finger-pointing, and obnoxious tweeting. We know you’re rich and in charge. Now use your mess of money for something good. Why not help rebuild a third-world country, or why not rebuild one of our own poverty-stricken neighborhoods right here in America? You don’t need to look very far. It might make you happy.

Shut it.

I want to know why these skeletons were responsible for deforming their own heads. In other words, while living, these people went through some kind of cranial rite of passage where their heads were purposefully distorted. Psst…or there could be a more rational explanation. Maybe they really are aliens.

Alien skull
Not the actual skull discovered, but similar. Note the conehead shape. See link for actual pictures.

In fact, this is the year we may find our sister planet Earth. Why isn’t this headline news? Enough of the fiscal cliff. We’re all doomed. But a sister planet Earth…maybe the aliens can save us. In a Universe so vast with an estimated 200 billion stars that host at least 50 billion planets (and this, just in the Milky Way), how can we think we’re all alone?

And finally, I want to know why this product is using my blog name and didn’t even consult me. It’s a Reese’s peanut butter cup moment: How did my blog name get into your product? And, how did your product get into my blog? All right, I guess I put it here.

Looks at all the ways you can bumble...
Look at all the ways you can bumble…
Look at the products that you can bristle, tousle, and tumble bumble with.
Look at all the products that you can bristle, tousle, and tumble bumble with.

It must be good with a name like Bumble, right? Actually, I need shampoo. Truth be told, lately I’ve been using my kids’ strawberry bath wash as shampoo. Oh, how could I let things get to this state? This year is off to a rocky start….
but soon, I’ll be washing my hair with my new Bumble shampoo…

Two Hours Later

Strike that. So, this Bumble shampoo has got to be the most expensive shampoo on the planet. My body wash will last one more day….

In the meantime, I will be expecting some answers. I’m counting on you.

For your listening pleasure, please enjoy the music by The Neighbourhood.

photo credit: Gage Skidmore, dreamside via photopin cc

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83 Comments

  3. It’s so easy to get dosages wrong with medicines, sometimes the instructions aren’t all that clear, and I’ve had instances where the doctor has told me one dosage instruction, the pharmacist has told me a different one, and the packages instructions were different again! A few years ago, I had some medicine for my daughter and it said the dosage was 2.5ml, but the print was so small I read it as 2x5ml, so I gave her 10ml, i.e. 4 times the proper dosage! I panicked when I realised and phoned the doctor, luckily they said it might just make her a bit drowsy but nothing to worry about. I just think people must get dosages wrong all the time.

    Sorry, I’m just coming up with more problems instead of solutions!

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    1. No, that’s all right Vanessa. I sense you needed to vent a little. It is ridiculous, right? We’re set up for failure. They could make it a lot easier on us by providing clear instructions and a simple way to administer the drugs. And, it’s not rocket science. It’s always a headache. Oh no! The dreaded medicine cup! I’m sorry to hear about your medicine experience with your daughter. Scary! Lucky nothing went wrong. Thank goodness!

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  6. That’s a good point about the medicine cups. Dosage makes a huge difference so you think they’d make it extra clear. As for Donald Trump, it would be nice if he’d go away, but I’m sure he won’t any time soon. He enjoys being loud and opinionated, I’m sure.
    By the way, maybe you should start your own competing line of Bumble products. Whatever you want. As long as it’s nothing icky for women, I’ll buy it. 🙂

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    1. Right…dosage is everything, and could be fatal if not accurate. They don’t want kids having cough syrup anymore because of dosage problems, and then look at this cup! I know…I wish Trump would vanish. Or, he could do something really useful if he wanted. But, he probably won’t because he’s too greedy. Well, I’ll give my product line some thought…er…have any suggestions?

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  9. Answer #1: ink on the measuring cup to make the lines visible might cost o.ooo1% of a cent. Never mind the lose of life that not having it might cost.
    Answer #2: Your grocery store only has to separate the cookies and crackers by a safe distance but certainly do not have to be on separate aisles. I think 6 inches is the recommended standard. HA HA!
    I agree with those above about the cone heads and SNL, and poor Donald proves that money does not buy happiness. Am thinking he needs some Bumble and Bumble shampoo–he could afford it!
    Love this rant. Do you feel better?

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    1. Thanks, Ly. Yes, I feel better. I will tell my store the standard distance…and told them you said so. The medicine cup is a mystery! I don’t think even Bumble shampoo will help Donald, but it’s nice of you to consider him. He definitely could afford it!

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  10. You gave Donald more space here than he deserves.

    As the measuring cups, I recently saw some easy-to-read ones.

    Crackers & cookies in separate aisles because I don’t put cookies in my soup.

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    2. Frank, I almost took Donald out, so I totally understand and respect your opinion on this. I won’t spend another minute on him!

      As for measuring cups, I did have one once that had lines on it, but it disappeared, mysteriously. I know these measuring cups exist.

      Crackers and cookies…thanks for clearing this up. They wouldn’t want to confuse us. It’s simple, huh?

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  13. I’ve never thought about the medicine cup, Bumble but it’s a very good point! The cookie/crackers issue — I think it depends on the grocer. Donald Trump — I just have no words since I don’t follow is tweets — seriously he tweets? I don’t think we’re alone in the vast universe and perhaps the skulls could be from someone who obviously needed to be born via C-section and didn’t have the surgeons with the skill and that shampoo — never tried it but I bet it smells good and I do love the name. How’s that for quick summation of the ponderings of your brain? Sorry, it’s still early…

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    1. Brigitte. that was outstanding! I appreciate you taking the time to ponder. Donald does tweet, although I don’t follow. I don’t actually twitter as I don’t think I can take anything else on. Maybe some day. But I’ve seen a few of his tweets, and he is known for putting some outlandish stuff out there. Sometimes, I think he can’t possibly take himself seriously. The skulls issue, I’d rather think they’re aliens than to think someone would actually to do that their heads on purpose. The Bumble shampoo was tempting as I truly did (do) need shampoo…but forget it! Even if I had money, I wouldn’t spend that much on shampoo!

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  14. as for the medicine cup. Take a marker and put your own line on it. Cookies are sweet/ crackers are savory, thus the different aisles ( I actually asked someone at the store one time and thats the answer I got).. Donald Trump has too much hairspray on the brain, he needs to lay off that stuff! The skull, who knows. ha! Why is one Bumble capitalized and one is not? opps sorry, that was another question. That’s all I got for you. 🙂

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    1. Jackie, I appreciate you taking time to provide answers for me. Yes, a line on the cup. That could be useful so long as I got around to doing it. Oh, so I see you’ve had the cookie/cracker problem before. It’s senseless really. And, the Bumble products…I guess they think they’re being stylish and cute. And, they’re trying to be welcoming…look at informal we are, never mind the sticker price. This is the most expensive shampoo I’ve ever seen!! Almost $29 for 8 ounces. Forget it!

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      1. unfortunately I didn’t provide any answers for you! haha! sorry. Wow that is expensive! that’s my whole soap, shampoo and other toiletries budget!

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  15. Well, I can only guess that The Donald always looks angry because he’s so ticked off about the butt-ugly looks he was given. Normally, I don’t like to make fun of people–celebrity or not–but I make an exception for Donald Trump and Ann Coulter. They both have big enough egos to take it.

    And by the way, if I washed my long hair with kid’s strawberry bath wash, I’d be in tears trying to comb out the tangles. Ouch.

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    1. I think Donald asked for it. You wonder if he really takes himself seriously. Maybe it’s just his “brand,” but then no. That’s w ho is really is. It’s scary and sad.

      I know…I’m in a bad state with this shampoo. I must get some right away! Kids are in back and I can be sane again.

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  16. Count yourself lucky. I went into a local store here in Dublin the other day, and not only had they divided the biscuits (that’s the cookies in Irish-land) from the crackers, but they had subdivided both cookies AND crackers into at least 3 different mystery categories, scattered randomly around the store. I know, horrific. I’m only getting over it now in fact. (I am extremely sensitive about this type of thing)

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    1. Oh dear! That is horrific…wow, I guess I should feel better about my situation seeing how much worse it could be. You must want to just run from the store. I hope your situation improves or you find a new store! Good luck to you.

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  17. If I share the answers, ‘they’ll’ come for me. I’ve been hiding from them for years…
    You do understand that I can’t share this info…they’re already on to me. As I’m here writing this you just commented on my blog.
    They know something is wrong! I’m hiding under the desk for the next few hours….Where’s my metal pot hat? AHHHHH

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  18. I can maybe help.
    The lines on the measuring cup are fuzzy because NyQuil is meant to be chugged.
    I was not aware that cookies and crackers were on different aisles, so I’m of no use there.
    The Donald looks mad because he is. If the Lord bestowed upon you riches beyond your wildest imagination, but then as a gag, stuck you with the worst comb-over EVER, you’d be pretty grumpy, too.
    People deformed their heads as a fashion statement because, historically speaking, humans are a pretty stupid race. We haven’t improved much. As evidence, I give you the mullet.
    I’m not sure why your name was plagiarized, but it sucks, I know. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but apparently, several large bees have also been using the name.

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    1. Well, you certainly helped me out here. I’m following you right away. Damn, those bees! No! In my store, the cookies and crackers are not together. I’m sure they’re all quite distraught about it. Donald, I know…you almost want to feel sorry for him….nah! It’s true humans need help! That’s why the aliens will save us.

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  19. You’ve got my vote for the aliens! 😉

    I wish I had the answers for you. I think D. Trump needs a bitch slap to wipe that stupid look off his face (that’s the only way I know how to slap, so I’ll volunteer).

    Invent a medicine cup with big black lines and numbers – you’ll make a fortune 😀

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    1. Dianne, be my guest for bitch slapping. The aliens will show us way, someday. As for the medicine cup…you might be right! I mean, I could just sell it all by itself. People would probably buy it. 🙂

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  20. While I don’t have the answers either, I’d like to throw in another question:

    Why do they separate the bars of soap from the body wash? I searched and searched yesterday, until I finally found them in the aisle with the cleaning products, on the other side of the store. While I prefer body wash, the fiance likes bar soap. I’m not using bar soap to clean my house!

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  21. My grocery store groups crackers and cookies together. I get that. But they put the peanut sauce in with the oil and (further along) mustard. What? I guess it was grouped with things you could pour.
    I like those coneheads. I’d like to see a nice warm toque to cover that alien head.
    Bumble & Bumble is crazy expensive. Maybe the Donald uses it to wash his 5 locks of hair.
    Sorry, no answers. Just comments.

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    1. Tania, a toque would look perfect on the alien head! Ha ha. That would be an interesting category in a store. wouldn’t it? Things that pour. That would be a huge aisle, and confuse the hell out of everybody. But, I think we’re already confused. I’ve never seen such expensive shampoo…what is there gold in it?! Only the Donald can afford this. I would have liked to buy it, but it was past my shampoo purchasing limit. Comments work for me anytime! Thanks.

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  23. I always past the Bumble & Bumble products too. The price tag for a bottle of shampoo is enough to buy one child an entire outfit. As for the stinking medicine cups, I just had that same problem this morning. I was trying to give my little guy some Tylenol and I couldn’t see the lines. I winged it. By the way, your posts are not showing up in my reader. Has anyone else had that problem?

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    1. Anka, I know. Do those Bumble products have gold in them or what?! I couldn’t believe my eyes how much they cost. It was beyond my shampoo budget! I guess the medicine is a problem for most people. We’re not alone. You think they would make it easier for people to use, right? I have a lot of posts that don’t ever make it to my Reader. I’m not quite sure why. I think I must miss a lot. I’ve started to subscribe via email. You could try that. Thanks for mentioning it to me.

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    1. Adam, I’ve never seen it. Is this a real show? What channel is it on? And, hey, how can you not be excited about aliens? Don’t worry…I’m not really a nut. But I do think the prospect of alien life is exciting.

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      1. What?! I love that show. It’s on H2 — the History Channel. I don’t know what time, but it’s always on. They talked about that skull in one of the episodes. I get into all that crap…
        …Because I AM a nut.

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      3. No, never really got into it. But, Gillian Anderson was hot. And I kind of like the theme song. Sorta. Oh yeah, and the smoking guy. That guy made smoking looking like a piece of chocolate cake.

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      6. Fox?! That would be Fox Mulder. You know, main character. Ha ha. Okay, I guess you really weren’t into this after all. I used to love that guy. You know, David Ducovney…the sex addict guy, now in Californication.

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  26. 1. a)The lines on the cups are just visible enough to legally cover their behinds if you over/under dose the meds.
    1. b) Companies can blame it on shoppers going crackers in the cookie aisle.
    2. Donald is always angry because he does not have a cone-head. There are somethings money can not buy.
    3. The cone-heads want to know why we deformed our heads to prevent our craniums from having a normal shape.
    4. The people on our sister planet do not what to have anything to do with us because: we look strange, don’t understand the relationship between crackers and cookies, got rid of the cone-heads & they saw Donald Trump when the monitored our communications broadcasts.
    5. Cosmetic & drug companies work together. They know the truth about the cookies and the cone-heads. Don’t trust them.
    Enjoy the day !

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    1. Your rationale is superb. Yes, of course for 1a…it’s as plain as day now. It’s a legal measure. You can’t blame something you can even see, or you’re not sure that you see, right? Well, your guess is as good mine about Donald. Maybe his head should be reshaped. Maybe it would be an attractive look on him and he’d be less pissed off that way. #4.Yes, yes, humans are strange. That’s why we haven’t been rescued. Cosmetic and drug companies, cookies, crackers and coneheads…this is the making of a great sitcom. I want to post your comments, they are so excellent. A+ for you.

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  27. I’ll tell you, I used to go to the Bumble & Bumble salon to get my hair cut, and their products are really good. But they really are ridiculously expensive. I don’t buy them anymore. My supermarket groups the crackers and cookies in the same aisle, so I’m happy. I wouldn’t like it if they were separated, it’s too much work to schlep to different aisles for my round, disk-like snack needs. The lines on those medicine cups are insane. I’m already in a fog from not feeling well, and now you want me to squint real hard to see the measuring line? Come on!! As for The Donald, if you looked like that, wouldn’t you be pissed off? Also, I think you should write to the Reese’s people and demand royalties. It’s only fair. 😀

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    1. Oh, Madame! You’ve made everything right for me here. I’m sure Bumble and bumble must be good! As good as gold probably. I know it’s a New York product, correct? So, it gets away with being tres expensive. Schelpping for disc-like snacks. Haha – I need to write that one down Weebs. I’m considering marketing medicine cups with lines…What do you think? Little inside joke, huh…shh…;)

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  29. All I know is that the skull in that photo reminded me of ‘sagittal crest’.
    Which was the one term I managed to remember from my Anthropology class.
    Oh, that and Australopithecine.
    Very exciting, I know.
    Or…
    🙂

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  30. Just be careful one of the two..the cookies or the crackers…are not doggie biscuits – I made that mistake here in Finland, where the dog meat is also above vegetables and the pasta & tomato sauce in different aisles. great points for meditation over…without the wonderfully named shampoo. Trump’s legacy is overwhelmingly negative, which should shame him intensely, and his achievement’s in that arena of honest legacy put him in the same basket as that other guy, who was running for president and so cleverly avoided paying his taxes, whatever his name was.
    Intriguing cranium…Levi-Strauss, anthropologist, says the world started without humans and almost certainly will end without them…perhaps a remnant of a visit from the future?

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    1. I love all your comments. They made my evening. I appreciate your thoughtful feedback. It’s interesting that everyone has a story about their grocery store and how food is arranged. It is part of our daily living I guess. But dog meat above the vegetables…this can’t be good anywhere.
      Trump is just sad. Probably nothing will change there. He loves being Mr. Mean and Nasty.
      Intriguing cranium…is it not strange? They say if you live another 20 years you may live forever…so maybe we could find out.

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