It’s time for Friday Fictioneers. As always, thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for leading this group.
I just love bookstores. I hope they don’t all go away.
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Genre: Humor (100 words)
Copyright – Claire Fuller
Book Club Stalker
The book club gathered weekly, an exclusive female unit, outfitted with painted lips and stiletto heels. They didn’t gather to talk about the latest, popularized drivel. Their eyes darted from their books to scout the room, ready to pounce on the last available intelligent males on the planet.
Simon peeked through a column of books and watched in horror as they laughed boisterously, obviously disturbing the other patrons. He plopped into a cushy chair near their table, and glared.
Ian, the store owner, tapped him on the shoulder.
“Simon, man. These are paying customers. You’re scaring them.”
“Me?” Simon gasped.
AmyReeseWrites 
Hmm, that doesn’t sound like my book club. I think I missed out here…
Fun read!
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Thanks, Carrie! I actually haven’t been in a book club in a long time. Of course, this is Simon’s perspective of the book club. Hey, you changed your picture. I like it!!
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Thanks!
And I made myself join a book club. It assures that I get out at least once a month…
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That’s an excellent idea. I was supposed to join one, but I forgot all about it! Maybe I will see about doing that again.
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I’m with Simon. They’re the scary ones.
janet
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Yes, I agree completely, Janet. If I were Simon, I would run.
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Exclusive female unit – stalkers in stockings! An intelligent man would make tracks out there. Funny flash, Amy.
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Thanks, Honie. I would, too, if I were him!
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I just got goosebumps, Amy! You’ve done a wonderful job of describing what seems to be a very intense atmosphere!
I don’t get nearly as much reading done as I would like, but I really like bookstores… particularly the art section! And (while I know it’s usually not wise to judge a book by its cover) I just like looking at cover design in general… I always thought it would be fun to design them!
🙂
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Robert, I don’t get nearly as much read as I’d like either!! I’m thrilled I gave you goosebumps. Thank you. If I ever have a book, you can be my designer….I mean if you’d like! 🙂
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What a kind thing to say, Amy, thank you!
Now I have goosebumps AND I’m blushing! That would be quite an honor!
🙂
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The honor would be all mine, Robert. I love your work!! 🙂
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Book stores attract all types, if you know what I mean? Sometimes I go in to observe. I’m sure Im being observed, too. I would be sad to see book stores fade away.
Loved this, Amy. No book club would be complete without a stalker. You really captured the right feeling. That atmosphere can be intense.
Just as a side bar – In one of my screen plays I have a book club and it was really fun to write. It’s a challenge to have characters respond to (made-up) books — the differing opinions and arguments that ensue. ha! Good times. 🙂
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Lisa, I hardly ever go to bookstores anymore. The Borders closed here about a year ago, and the nearest bookstore is a bit of a drive. I’m sad about that. It was a nice place to go, hang out. It was the last place open out here in the suburbs.
That would be tough to talk about made-up books. I applaud you for that! I bet it’s funny! Wasn’t there a movie about a book club? Can’t think of the name….
Thanks! As always, thanks for reading, Lisa.
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Really cool story. I love that the book club members (and the book shop owner) viewed him as a stalker! Perspective is everything.
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Thank you, Jan. Thanks for your lovely comments. It’s all a matter of perspective, isn’t it? I almost called this Stalker Book Club to imply that the book club members were
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Sorry, Jan. I’ve lost my mouse today and it’s really throwing me…what was I saying…I almost called this Stalker Book Club to imply that the book club were the real stalkers, but went this way instead.
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Cute twist on the story.
What day of the month do they meet? I’ll come out of my man cave, and even clean up, to let them check me out. Maybe even bring a few available friends with me. I’ll be the one with Starbucks in on hand and a copy of MAD magazine in the other.
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Thanks. Well, they meet on Tuesday afternoons. Can you swing it? I advise a shave and shower before appearing in front of this group! The more, the merrier. I don’t think they’ll approve of MAD, but if you find that special someone who does, you know you’ve found your girl! I, of course, adore MAD!
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Somehow it’s not a stretch to see you with MAD magazine in two, Randy. What, me worry?
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Very clever twist, Amy. Loved it!
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Thank you kindly, Cathy! I’m glad you enjoyed it.
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I echo what others have already said–a very clever arrangement of details. Though I find the women of the book club more fascinating than the stalker. It sounds like they are a bunch of desperate cougars!
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Thanks, Anka. Thanks for the read. Yes, desperate…they think they’re being clever, but Simon sees right through them. I didn’t spend too much time on the women. Perhaps, it could be a good premise for a longer story. Maybe he meets someone he likes…or they have a big brawl! 🙂
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You definitely have enough material for a longer story. I could see several scenarios playing out. The one about Simon meeting someone he likes would peek my interest! 🙂
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Thanks for the feedback, Anka. 🙂
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I could just imagine the scene. And a nice twist on this.
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Thanks, Sandra. That’s a nice compliment that you can imagine it! Thank you.
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Hi Amy
What a great story – I think I’m with Simon though, those women sound pretty scary!
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Hi El,
Indeed, they are scary, especially as a pack! Thanks.
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That sounds like a fun book club! Such a fun read. Thanks, Amy. I can see you taking this in a fun direction.
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Thanks, Debra. That’s why I love doing this prompt…you just never know what you’ll come up with. I can see extending this one. Thanks for reading!
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Hey Simon … get your butt out of that chair and run!
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Exactly, Frank. Simon could be in trouble if he doesn’t watch it!
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Wonderful post, but I just need to know – how is it that you chose not only one, but both of my sons names for this prompt? That, and both their characters fit the personality of each. Eerie!
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T,
I am absolutely spellbound by this!!! You must think I’m stalking you…I swear the only think I know about you is that you go by the name “T,” so….What are the chances? What an incredible coincidence!! And, you say my characters even fit their personalities. Eerie, indeed. Have we met in a former life?! I’m blown away.
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I swear if you met them, you would be even further creeped to see the similarities! W
Hey, we may very well have met in a former life – if so, I would have been the pasty white bald one with a slight slouch. Remember me now? =)
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Ha ha!! I’m still quick mystified by this!
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Most of the small, family owned, bookstores have their own regulars just like a coffee shop or a bar. These folks have a tendency to stare at you when you come in if you’re not part of the group. I love the stalker uniform–painted lips and stiletto heels.
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Those are my favorite kind of bookstores…the ones with regulars. Thanks, Russell. I appreciate it!
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Book stores rock!
Thanks for the run read!
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Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed it. I miss roaming around bookstores. I hardly do it anymore.
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This is great, Amy. Poor Simon! – LOL 😀
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Thanks, Dianne! Yes, poor poor Simon. 🙂
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Hmm, there is a slight story idea coming to me.
I really liked this one!
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/04/24/friday-fictioneers-4262013-genre-fiction-rated-g/
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Thank you, Scott. I appreciate that!
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This is scary… I clearly sympathise with poor Simon… Thank god for e-books.
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Thanks, Bjorn. Simon is in pretty deep here! I don’t mind e-books so long as there are the real ones!
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Dear Amy,
I’d say this is a club for the books. I agree with the others, Simon should run. Unique take. I enjoyed it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Thanks for your kind words. I always appreciate your comments. You’re right. Simon should run and get the heck out of there!
Shalom,
Amy
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It’s interesting how little details like referring to them as “a unit” and having them “scout” the room makes them sound more militant. Sounds pretty intimidating to me too. 🙂 As always, your telling of this is beautiful.
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Thank you, David. Thanks for the kind words!
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Loved your story.
Like everyone else AnElephant frets about the decline of book stores but was recently in Powell’s in Portland, Oregon.
Might be the best bookshop in the world!
http://anelephantcant.me/2013/02/13/anelephant-stay-or-he-gone/
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Thank you, Elephant! I’m pleased you enjoyed it.
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hahaha this was awesome ^^ never occurred to me that the library’s where one could get the ‘last available intelligent males on the planet.’ i could almost see the scene. it was so funny ^^
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Thanks, kz! I think a bookstore wouldn’t be a bad place to check. Ha ha!
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‘painted lips and stiletto heels’… Love that description!
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Ironically, these women aren’t so much intelligent as vampirish! Funny yet serious yet sad story, that raises questions. Enjoyed it. Ann
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Thanks, Ann! I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I think I have some more material here for a longer story.
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🙂
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I hope to read it when written. 🙂
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Thank you, Ann. 🙂
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Boy, using books for another purpose other than reading them — Why, that’s never been done before! Perceptive and cute take on the prompt.
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Books can get you places, right? Like a hot date? Thanks, Perry!
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I wonder if all this is in Simon’s head! If so, he’s got a high opinion of his own intelligence and a low opinion of everyone else.
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It very well could be in his head. He could be a little delusional, too! Thanks for reading mine.
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So this is what it might look like if all the guys were ejected from the book club in the Book Club TV show (yes there was a show, Canadian or British or something).
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Really? I’d like to see this show, Adam. Did they just sit around and talk books? Thanks for reading.
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Correction (my bad): The Book Group, it aired in the U.K., bet. 2002-03, and reran/reruns on Ovation TV (available in the U.S.). And, of course, some didn’t get into the group to read… there’s adult content.
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Thanks, Adam. I’ll see if I can find it.
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Sacring or being scared, it all depends on your perspective!
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Exactly, Joe. Things are not always as they seem. Thanks for reading.
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I’m with Simon. I’m more scared of book club members like these.
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Oh hi, Weebs! Yes, me too! You should be very afraid.
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Very funny – you painted those scary women really well.
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Thanks, Sarah!
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Hilarious! Scared me too, by the way.
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Thank you!
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