It’s time for Friday Fictioneers. Thank you to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for being such a gracious host. Thanks to Rich Voza for the intriguing picture. It’s a goody and a challenge.
I decided to go the sci-fi route, it’s so tempting. I can’t wait to see what people came up with this week. Click here for more wonderful stories from the Fictioneers.
Genre: Sci-Fi (100 words)
Copyright – Rich Voza
Just One
The sky spit out their bodies in a sea of debris and they landed in a crushed heap. Thrashed and bleeding, Isack laid motionless. Merrell collapsed into his side.
“Not again,” she gasped.
“Last time it was the blue door.” Isack lifted his head. “The order…it’s different. It was blue, white. Now it’s…”
“We’ve tried them all,” Merrell cried. “We’re stuck.”
“That’s it. The color never mattered,” he jumped to his feet.
When the sky snapped, he dove through the window in the door. Isack and the doors vanished before her eyes. There had been room for only one more.
Oh my! This is so clever and fun! I am dying to know the rest… I want more! Bravo.
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Thank you, Dawn! I appreciate that.
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Very good; great take on the prompt. And an effective punch-line.
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Thank you, Sandra. The end wasn’t clear in the beginning of writing it. I’m pretty satisfied with it for once.
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Poor Merrell left behind and no doors left…
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Indeed, she is also just one, all alone. What bad luck!
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Hope she is OK!
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I’m not so sure she will be! I think she’s a fighter, so I hope so too.
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That was really good. Give me more!!
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Thanks, Stephen! Glad you enjoyed it.
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Dear Amy,
She should retry the doors now that things have been reset by Issak’s decision to choose the window. Great story.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug,
I’m not sure the doors are coming back. But if they do, I’m sure Merrill won’t waste any time. Thanks!
Aloha,
Amy
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Dear Amy,
Hope there’s another opening soon.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks, Rochelle. Anything is possible!
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Well done Amy, interest aroused.
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Thank you, Summer. Thanks for your kind comments!
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Tense, human and then ‘the sky snapped.’ Love it!
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Thank you, Brenda! I’m glad you enjoyed it.
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Oh, this was awesome! You’ve got me itching to know more…
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Oh, thank you, Tiffany! I’m glad you liked ti.
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Poor Merrell. If only she’d realized sooner that color never mattered. Hmmm, subtle lesson in that science fiction. I like the way you describe the action. That sky is vicious; spitting and snapping.
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Hmm…seem too contrived? My idea was that Isack didn’t even realize about the “one more” issue, only that the specific door didn’t matter, because the order and the color was changing every time they got dropped from the sky. It probably doesn’t make that much sense. Or, it could be, he did figure it out and left without her. That works for me. Thanks for your feedback, Honie.
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Not at all, Amy. I like it. The meaning, yours or the readers, reaches out and snaps you. Just like that sky. Large and quick. Very nicely done. My take away will almost always be in some way connected to something I’ve written or thought, and I really enjoy it when I find something in another person’s writing that helps me make that connection.
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Thanks, Honie. Your words and that you connected to it mean a lot to me. Thanks for taking the time to tell me.
Sometimes as you write something it makes sense, and then you look at it later and wonder what you were thinking when you wrote it. I had a brief moment like that with this, but decided it makes just enough sense!
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Terrific. An awful lot of story.
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Thanks, Stephen!
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Great story, and a brill set up for more 🙂
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Thanks, Helen!
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That is in a similar direction to where I was going, but I think you did it better.
Minor thing. Window of the door. 4 words. Door’s window. 2 words.
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Oh, thank you, sir. It has a few holes, I think. I gave it a go. I liked yours. too.
Yeah…I think I had that at one point and switched it! Thanks for the suggestion.
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I would love to read the rest of the novel this came from!
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You’re too kind, Guapo. Thanks!
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Now that was good! I’m pulling for her. Those darn doors will be back, they usually are.
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Thanks, Jackie. I think they would return. She still has a chance!
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Great sci-fi…but poor Isack, but her adventuring partner will find a way to get back..in another 100 words (hint hint) 🙂
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Ah, thanks, Bastet! I could go for another 100 or two. Maybe I will go for a short story to start and see what I come up with. I appreciate you reading. Thank you. – Amy
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Thank would be super!
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Room for one more! There was an old Twilight Zone episode like that, Rochelle will know. Wonder which of the two will come out better?
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It sounds familiar now that you mention it, Perry. I’ll have to Google it! Thanks for telling me.
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Wow, you grabbed me from the first sentence. I loved the way you conveyed the endless frustration they had gone through. Great twist ending too. 🙂
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Oh, I loved that I grabbed you from the first sentence, David! It’s so good to hear that. I pictured them being kind of pounded and thrown from the sky. Visually, it would be quite something to see, I think. I hope my writing does it justice in the few words I have. Thanks a lot! 🙂
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Poor Merrell! I wonder if she’ll search for another way out or if she’ll camp out in the field waiting for the doors to come back?
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Yes, poor Merrell! I suppose either scenario is a possibility. I’m thinking the doors will show up somewhere else. Thanks for reading mine.
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Those portholes are not safe… and it’s sad when there is only room for one…
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What bad luck! Hey, thanks for reading mine.
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Brilliant! You had a full length blockbuster in 100 words. I really enjoyed it.
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Thank you, Michelle. I appreciate that!
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Yikes … only one more, thus the others must wait or totally lose out. Meanwhile … Hi Amy!
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Yikes!! She is left in the cold…
Hi Frank!! Good to see you? Are you back?
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Yep … well, trying to get back into the swing.
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That’s some trip they’ve been on!
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I agree! A trippy one. Thanks for reading.
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Very good and intriguing sci-fi, I must say, great description, and nice to leave it on edge like that. Very interesting genre, I must say.
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