Just Another Eyesore – Friday Fictioneers – 12/06/13

Welcome to Friday Fictioneers. Thanks to the lovely Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting the group and to Randy Mazie for providing this week’s photo.

Click here for more stories from the Fictioneers.

Genre: General Fiction (100 words)

Copyright –Randy Mazie

Just Another Eyesore

For a long time it was just another eyesore to ignore everyday. One of many tagged corners, permeating from within, spreading like a virus throughout the neighborhood.

Jess accepted the blemish on the corner when the homeless crashed it and made it their own; the purple flowers, an invitation to stay. It wasn’t until one of them claimed it with the “No Tressrassing” that all hell broke loose and their home was slated for the wrecking ball. It was a sick joke that didn’t pan out. Nobody is laughing now.

Hiding behind jailed tears, Jess rode past on his bike.

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61 thoughts on “Just Another Eyesore – Friday Fictioneers – 12/06/13

  1. If only the new occupants had kept “under the radar”, people could have maintained the fiction that they didn’t know the building was occupied and just let it be.
    I also like the “jailed tears”.

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    1. Thank you, kz. You think jailed tears must have come up somewhere, right? But, maybe not. I’m not sure how came upon it. I was thinking, he wants to cry but can’t and what’s the use anyway. He is trapped in a prison, which I think happens to people who live in poverty everyday.

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  2. Amy, I like the image and the fact that you incorporated, as many have mentioned above “jailed tears.” It makes me think, in a very short synopsis here, that Jess has experienced many “jails,” both literal and metaphorically and I think that was your intention. So well done!

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  3. Lots seem to like (as I do) those ‘jailed tears’. That’s what’s so good about these photo prompts – one image triggers another and another, until a whole new world is created and populated by others triggering images – just like your story. 🙂

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  4. I really like the progression of the story, Amy. The last line is particularly powerful, but the entire story has a somewhat bittersweet feel to it. I’m not really sure what the sweet part is, but it really feels that way to me. The essence of urban decay is in the story. Nice job!

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    1. Dawn, thanks for your thoughtful comments. I get what you’re saying, but like you, have a hard time finding the sweetness. Hmm…maybe because it’s what he’s knows and it’s home to him, and that he cares about what happens to these people, perhaps because it just as easily could be him.

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  5. Reading through the comments, it seemed like you really struck a chord with the phrase “jailed tears”. It is a great, unique metaphor that expresses the point perfectly. I wonder if this is the sort of scene in a lot of areas of Detroit, where a lot of houses are abandoned.

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    1. It’s a sad situation out there for people who find themselves in it. In college, I spent a night with the homeless people on the street. Don’t worry, I didn’t do it alone. I found out a lot of them don’t want to be bothered.

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  6. i’m stuck on the word “permeating.” it feels positive to me, but the scene of course is not positive. i’m trying to think of a similar word that’s more negative, like when a bad smell invades your nose. i’m stuck. or maybe i’m wrong and permeating is not positive. the the overall concept is well done.

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