It’s time for Friday Fictioneers. Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, our wonderful host, for her dedication to this group. I am so grateful to her.
Thanks to Dawn for the photo this week.
For more fabulous stories from the Fictioneers, click here.
Genre: General Fiction (100 words)
No More
Mary could never get enough light. Whenever she watched news about missing children, she thought of her Tommy as if she were experiencing it fresh. Mary dragged in lamps from garage sales for the missing kids on TV, and she left the light on for them, too.
We stopped counting the years when our kids graduated from high school. Tommy would have been twenty the morning Mary got the knock on her door. She wept, gripping tears, while her body convulsed, demanding their release. Then she collected herself, and methodically removed each lamp from the house, her shining light extinguished.
Wow a lot of emotion in this one Amy. Sad but great writing.
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So sad, I know. I almost didn’t want to write it, but it’s the idea that came to me. Thanks, Jackie.
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A dark topic, but not a terror story…. really powerful Amy. This is great!
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As a parent, it’s one of the darkest. Thank you, Dawn. I appreciate that!
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Very effective story, Amy, with powerful last sentence. Not quite sure “steadfast” in the prior sentence is best word choice, but otherwise very well done.
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Thanks, Perry. Have any other ideas?
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A great idea and extremely well executed. Powerful.
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Thank you, Sandra. I appreciate that!
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Gulp – I am with the poor woman
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Me, too. I can’t even imagine just how bad that would feel. Thanks, Jim.
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Love this. (I was thinking along the same lines but got there in a different way.) :>
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Thank you! I will definitely be by to read yours. It’s always interesting to see different paths.
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Wow, powerful! That was awesome, I love it.
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Thank you! Thanks for reading.
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Amy,
There is a lot of possible symbolism in this. What came to my mind when I read it was that she was metaphorically putting a lamp in the window for someone lost out in the night, or that the lamps represented the glow of her hope, or that they were similar to candles people light for others in a cathedral. I’m not sure what you intended, but that’s what came to my mind. In any case, very well done. Very powerful stuff.
-David
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David, all of the above applies. I appreciate your thoughtful comments. It definitely represented the glow of her hope. That’s so poetic. And, as if in a church or cathedral. It was a means to get herself through the pain. Thanks so much!
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Poor Mary. My heart breaks for her.
Beautifully done, Amy.
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Mine, too. What could be worse? Whenever I have a bad day, I know it’s never this bad. Thanks, Michelle.
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Wow. Chilling but beautiful writing.
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Thanks, Rachelle.
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Sad – but beautiful
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Thank you, Denise!
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For parents the scariest type of story. Very well written.
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I agree with you on that one. Thank you!
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oh my goodness, that was very emotional. great writing, Amy. 🙂
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Thank you, K.Z.
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A mother’s worst nightmare. A mother’s natural response, holding out all hope until that dreadful moment. It’s difficult to imagine, but you did it well.
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Thanks, Honie. I never want to experience it, that’s for sure.
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Echoing the comments before me, Amy. Excellent use of the symbolism of light.
janet
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Thanks, Janet. As always, thanks for reading. Enjoy the beaches!!
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A nice turn of a metaphor. Light IS life!
The title made me think this was your last ever entry in the Friday Fictioneers series. No more. D’oh!
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Thanks! I know… I thought of that after I hit Publish, since it kind of reads exactly that way, doesn’t it? No, definitely not! I will still be here writing FF!
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Hi Amy,
Powerful story. The lights of home beckoning to a lost child. Heartbreakingly sad. Ron
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Thanks, Ron. Thanks for your thoughtful comments!
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Well done! Quite a punch at the end.
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Thanks, Guapo! I’m sorry I couldn’t make it a happy ending.
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Elegant and as eloquent as it is deep and dark.
Thanks
Kind regards
Kit
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Thank you, Kit. That’s very kind of you. Thanks for stopping by!
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That last sentence is beautiful!
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Thanks, Jen! Thanks for reading my story.
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A beautiful and heart-wrenching story! The waiting, hoping, and the loss all over again would be devastating for a parent.
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Thanks, Lisa. Indeed, it would be a difficult situation, to feel or not to feel. I don’t think you would have a choice but to be overcome by loss in the end.
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Nicely done and very powerful!
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Thank you, Riya!
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When finally the hope is quenched…. so is all the light… great and gripping.
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Thanks, Bjorn. I appreciate your thoughtful comments. It’s a sad one.
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A heartbreaking story. Well written.
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Thank you!
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Oh Dear.
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Oh sorry to be a downer, Ted.
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Oh No! Beautiful but SO sad 😦
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Thanks, Dianne. It is a sad one this week.
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Very sad. Maybe now she can move on with her life, though.
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I hope so, too. You think closure would be an important step to moving forward.
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A beautiful story, well-written of every mother’s worst nightmare. Very sad.
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Thanks, Patricia. I think so, too. It would be difficult to keep going. Thanks for reading.
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Dear Amy,
What a horribly, touching story. I can’t imagine, nor do I want to, what this mother felt at that moment. Truly her light was gone. I saw my mother in law go through this with my husband’s brother who was killed in a car accident in 1974.
Wonderfully written.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
It was a tough one to write and I wrote one sentence over and over, feeling like I couldn’t possibly express the agony of what she might feel. I’ve never known anyone who has experienced this. I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your mother-in-law. That’s so sad. The only thing that helps me is thinking that death is not the end. The older I get, the more I believe this. Thank you.
Amy
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So sad Amy but I absolutely loved your take on this and the way you incorporated the light and the lamps. Nicely done!
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Thank you much, Deanna!
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Dear Amy,
This is one of those stories that makes your stomach knot-up. Touch to hear, but still, they must be told. Very well written.
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That was supposed to say “tough” to hear. Pardon my typos
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Yes, a sad one today. Thank you, Russell. Thanks for reading.
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That was such a good bit of writing.
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Thanks, Trent. Thanks for reading!
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No worries – you’ve got style. I appreciate prose so much, even if it’s small bits – but your small bits feel very large, if that makes any sense.
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Ah, thanks! That’s very kind of you to say. Practice makes perfect. I always treat this as an exercise to say more with less. Amazingly, it gives me great ideas for longer stories. I’m working on a longer story I’m going to put out there in longer bits. Soon.
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Excellent. I’ll be there. I keep trying to shy away from longer stories, but that’s what I really like to write, but I hate burdening people with them. I figure the words will figure out how many are needed, and that’s that.
Looking forward to it.
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I know! I’ve always had a problem with that, too. What I’m going to try to do is to put out shorter bits (but longer than 100 words) more often. Of course, this means I need to produce a steady stream of writing. It’s my plan anyway, and you heard it first! Oh now I must do it!
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I’m totally ripping that concept off, by the way… it’s gold.
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Hey, go for it!! You have my support. I think fiction on the blog is a tough one. It’s hard for people to drop everything and get into a character and a story. I think this could work. Try it!!
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I think I might. Fiction is tough for me too but it’s what I like to write. Can’t remember who it was, but someone noted in their blog post that their life is interesting, so many stories to write about. Well my life is a bit dull, so I make up my stories – and love it. Just love it.
Thanks for the permission, and for the idea.
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Oh, great! I’m glad I could help. My life is pretty routine, too and don’t have a lot to say there, unless you want to hear me go on and on about my kids. I don’t really agree with throwing up a post just to be posting. There’s already so much to read, right? I can’t wait to see what you do! I hope it works!
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One of your bests Amy!
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Thanks, Dawn! Thanks for the inspiration.
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I m honored.
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Ah, thanks. 🙂
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Yours is the first of the “lamp” stories I’ve read this week, Amy – and wow! Lots of emotion and heartbreak in so few words. Nicely done.
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Thanks for that, Maddie. I appreciate your thoughtful comments.
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This was bursting at the seams with raw emotion.
Well done.
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Ah, thanks for that generous comment, Robert.
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Oh, Poor Mary. My heart broke for her. You did a great job writing an engaging and powerful story.
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Thank you! I’m glad you liked it.
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Well written story – Losing a child is a life event that you can’t ever get over. Nan
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I don’t see how you could over that either! Thank, Nan.
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So touching and beautifully written.
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Thanks, Sarah!
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I thought it might be Tommy! The twist was good!
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Ah, too bad it wasn’t, huh? That would have been a happier ending if Tommy had made it. Hey, thanks!
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Great piece right here. I could almost feel myself drowning in her tears.
Who delivered the news at the doorstep?
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Thanks, Eena. I hadn’t given much thought to who gave her the news. Maybe a detective.
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That’s the story that needed to be written for this picture. And you did it so well.
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Thanks, Linda! It was sad to write, but sometimes a story comes to you and that’s the one you must write.
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Well done! You move from hope into despair without missing a beat. Lights out.
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Thank you, Merlin. I love your comment!
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