Put Some Hair There – Friday Fictioneers

Put Some Hair There

“Put some hair on your chest,” said the captain.

A toothache left the fisherman convulsing.

“We can’t very well chop off your face,” and so he was airlifted to safety.

Since the toothache followed dinner, Boris, the ship’s cook, became the resident dentist. In his quest for dental instruments, he neglected his primary duty, fresh food.

His quiche, a crew favorite, and a perfect disguise for sprouted vegetation, had one moaning the night away, oozing pus and sweat; hair follicles pushed through his gums.

It stated “faulty instruments” in the coroner’s report, but no one ever requested quiche again.


Genre: Humorous Sea Story (99 words)

Today’s story was inspired by my first and last fishing expedition, when a fisherman asked me if I wanted a cheeseburger as my face turned green.

Thanks to lovely and talented Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for her dedication to Friday Fictioneers, and to Ted Strutz for the photo.

If you’d like to give this a try, click HERE for instructions. All are welcome.

Please click HERE for more stories from the Fictioneers.

Photo copyright: Ted Strutz


Copyright – Ted Strutz

65 thoughts on “Put Some Hair There – Friday Fictioneers

  1. Wow! That must have been some expedition you went on that caused THIS story to be born. But, you really put it down and it made a great tale. Super, Amy!


    1. Ha! I’ve never been back. I truly thought I was going to die! Ok, not really, but it’s definitely not something I want to voluntarily sign up for. Thanks!


  2. Dear Amy, My goodness – I do love quiche, but there is a limit to the amount of nausea related stories I can take. Maybe this is a new diet I can be on. The cook as a dentist, and not a very sanitary one at that! Poor crewman that ate the wrong piece of quiche! CREEPY, and Nothing sounds good at all right now! Good job and what is it Julia Child used to always say? Nan 🙂


    1. I’m behind in my reading this week, Nan. Are there a lot of disgusting stories? Dental instruments plus the sea are just not a good combination for me. Bon appetite? I hope your appetite comes back. Thanks for reading.


  3. Kind of reminds me of an old black-and-white film I just saw on TV, where the ship’s cook had no culinary experience whatsoever. However, it ended more happily since the crew loved his cooking. Excellent take on the photo prompt!


  4. Delicious (not) descriptions. The after effects of that quiche are scary – hair follicles pushing through gums – ouch and weird.


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