Beneath – Friday Fictioneers

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PHOTO PROMPT – Copyright – Georgia Koch

(Genre: Fantasy, 101 words)

Beneath

“We got an open boat,” Joe said. “Old man Cassel was due hours ago. C’mon.”

“Paddling in that pea soup makes about as much sense as surfing a tsunami. You ain’t gettin’ me in that boat.”

“Is this about Nellie? That’s nothing but a campfire story.”

Heavy air shrouded them, erasing their shapes. The skiff knocked around in the choppy water like driftwood as they attempted to steer in one direction. The water swelled, pulling them toward the center of the lake.

Joe’s radio buzzed. “We got Cassell. C’mon back. Over.”

“I can’t see anything—”

Their final direction: under, below, beneath.

*****************

Do you believe in sea monsters? I happen to believe in them. Of course, I do. The sea is too deep for there not to be a monster. What do you think?

Thanks to Captain Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for commanding this ship, and to Georgia Koch for the photo!

All are welcome to participate in Friday Fictioneers. Click here for guidance. Please click on the frog for more stories from the Fictioneers. They won’t disappoint.

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82 thoughts on “Beneath – Friday Fictioneers

  1. I think we had similar thoughts this week, Amy. 🙂 Anything with a foggy lake of mystery is my kind of story. You created an interesting effect by restating the last word. I felt as if I were being pulled down further with every word. Great job. (And yes, I would like to believe in sea monsters. At least I keep an open mind on the subject.)
    -David

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    1. Cool! I’ll be over soon. Thank you, David. I didn’t know exactly what effect I was after, so I’m very pleased you got that sense. Very good! The sea is still such a mystery, isn’t it? Most of it is still unknown. I may try to write an underwater story someday with sea monsters, of course.

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  2. Nice work, although I got confused between ‘Nellie’ (in the water) and ‘Nel’ (whose radio buzzed). I think you would have been better off changing one of their names 🙂

    Still, I enjoyed it.
    KT

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    1. You’re just full of mystery, Mark? Now I learn you were in the Coast Guard. I meant the term “floater” as a floating boat, I take it it’s to mean a person? Do you happen to know what a floating boat is called…an empty one? This mistake (if floating refers to a person) works, but changes my story a bit. Ah…one word can change everything. That’s what you learn doing this prompt!

      Yes, that is exactly what I’m trying to do! Shh…but don’t tell anyone.

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  3. That was fantastic Amy! Much too short. I am amazed that you could pull me in so quickly! I have always thought one sign of a good writer was their ability to take you to that place, where the story is happening. You did just that in a very short time with very few words! Bravo!

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  4. I absolutely believe in monsters from the water. When we were kids (young adults) my parents had a campsite on a lake. Once when we were all there my oldest step brother decided to tell the story of the lake monster “Soybean” to all our children who were under 12 years of age.
    It was a LONG night!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha! I love this story, Dawn. Thanks for sharing it. You will always be haunted by sea monsters now or perhaps even if you just hear the word “Soybean.” If I heard a sea monster story and I had to sleep right next to a lake, I’m sure I’d be scared out of my mind…even now.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. You do eerie well, Amy. If I was in a tiny boat about to be swallowed by the sea, I’d be a sea monster believer, but parked in a chair on dry land, I can be my usual, jaded self. Still, give me a crowded subway train at rush hour any time over that terror.

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    1. It’s hard to say whether or not the sea monster will eat the skiff. It’s okay, don’t be scared! 🙂 Something tells me, she isn’t very picky. Thanks so much, Ellespeth.

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  6. Very eerie, Amy! I like it!
    I have a ‘thing’ for monsters, and sea monsters are included, so I’d say I believe! That said, I’ve not yet had the opportunity to look for Nessie. One day, maybe!

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    1. Thank you, Tom! I’ve never had the chance either. I’m not too far from Lake Tahoe where there is said to be some kind of monster swimming the depths. It’s kind of fun to believe in it, so long as it keeps its distance!

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  7. Oh no. Love the opening lines – Joe’s assumption that Cassel’ was dead – but, ‘Paddling in that pea soup makes about as much sense as surfing a tsunami’ is just wonderful and tells us so much about the other character. Really enjoyed this but wish they hadn’t head downwards at the end there.

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    1. Thank you, Sarah. Thanks for your kind comments. I figured they would need a good reason to go in the pea soup. I know I would need a pretty good reason to paddle in that stuff. I have a feeling the monster is just getting started.

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  8. Great story. I was confused for a moment with the use of “floater.” I was thinking a dead body, but then realized it was a boat. I definitely believe in sea monsters so this was a wonderful read for me.

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    1. Thanks, Kirsten. I agree with you. It’s confusing. Partly, I wasn’t thinking this was a definition of a “floater,” but now of course I know it is. Duh! I would rewrite that part. Just haven’t changed it as I’ve been too lazy. 🙂 Thanks for your thoughtful comments.

      Liked by 1 person

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