My sister said to me the other day, “I just want to know where Dad is.” I still feel like I can call him and visit him down the street. He’s definitely not there. I could consult religious texts about this question of where one goes after life. Heaven, I hope. With an online search, I found myself reading a post on a blog about this subject. What else is new? The post went on to some length with a detailed description of what comes after death. Commenters of this particular post wanted to know how the blogger could possibly have the answers to all the questions. “How do you know this stuff?” Many asked this.
I might be asking that exact question except that some of the stuff she said was the exact same stuff that a friend of mine told me not long after my Dad died. “Oh,” she said, “He’ll be having his debriefing of his life soon. It will take about three weeks.” The blogger said the same thing. My friend considers herself to be a spiritual person, often aligning her beliefs with Native Americans, although she has had a Christian religious upbringing as well. My point is this wasn’t based on any particular religion. My friend went on to say that in this debriefing period, my dad would get an overview of his life. I reasoned he could see what he did good, what worked, how he screwed up, how he spent his time and with whom. The whole shebang.
The analysis could be discussed on a couch in the sky or perhaps a Dickens’s Christmas Carol spirit takes you by the hand and, together, you observe your life of the past, present and…the future, I guess we can rule out. It sounds reasonable enough that an angel might sit with you and just talk it out. Perhaps it will be a deep sleep where we dream it all. Perhaps, something that we can’t describe. I just hope there’s food because everything is better over a comforting meal. I don’t see why the talk/analysis can’t be done over a leisurely seven-course dinner with wine, and dessert and coffee.
All kidding aside, what I found illuminating was that this blogger, who knows everything, said that in the debriefing you will look at all the good you’ve done in your life and the ripple effect of those positive actions. You would then feel this goodness wash over you. Likewise, in ways that you hurt or caused pain, you get to feel that, too. This part made sense to me.
Lately, I’m more aware of the mindful choices that I can make each day. We do have choices about how we spend time in our lives, at least in our leisure time. I’m pretty certain that when we do the debrief we won’t care about how much money we made or spent, what we wore or what our hair looked like. Appearances won’t mean a thing. Most likely, all that will matter will be who we spent our time with.
I wondered if I could get a midterm life grade, a kind of check-in. I suppose this might only be available to those who have the near-death experience. Most of us don’t get this opportunity. I’ll admit, I actually don’t really want it. I will take my chances with the three-week debrief.
It’s said after the debrief is complete, you walk through a cleansing ring of fire. Later, you can do the whole life thing over again and give it another try. A future after all.
The truth is we really have no idea. I just thought it was funny that my friend and this random blogger both mentioned a three-week debriefing as a matter of fact. Since this blog post is six years old (here it is) and my friend doesn’t blog at all, they couldn’t have collaborated.
Hopefully, no matter what, we get to fly.