The Line Starts Here?
No there.
It wraps
around the building,
through an alley,
down the block,
on top of the telephone wire,
under a tunnel,
out a window,
and into a pond of—
Like a line at Disneyland.
The beanie hat shakes his head. This is for concert tickets.
No, it’s jobs. The government promised.
A little girl licks her lollipop.
It’s for the Ferris wheel, mama said.
Like a ride at Disneyland, but this thing ain’t moving, no how.
A line from hell.
You wait for the wheel in the line from hell.
A pond, you say?
You know
I
can’t
swim.
********************
(100 words)
PHOTO PROMPT – © Dee Lovering
********************
A little more on the abstract side this week. This is my contribution to Friday Fictioneers, a challenge to write a 100-word story based on a photo. What do you see in the photo? Why not give it a try?
My title is sort of part of my story, otherwise I’m exactly at 100 words. I think you can make it work.
Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting and to Dee Lovering for this week’s photo.
You can check out more stories from the Fictioneers HERE.
Wow, great take on this, very topical. And a bit scary. Job queues are insane aren’t they? and all over the world too.
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Any queue is scary! Oh, I should have used queue. That’s way cooler than line. 🙂 Thank you!
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Ha ha always happy to help! 😃
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I read once that people (on average) spend 6 months of their lives queuing. I blame those Apple fans for blowing it out for the rest of us.
I like this – it reads like a poem and seems to go longer than you expect (like a queue :)). I also liked the fact there is no obvious purpose to the queue – people seem to be joining simply because others are in it.
Nicely done.
KT
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KT, I’m not surprised by that number of six months for queuing. Your thoughts make me smile. This is exactly what I was going for! Yes, I wanted my words to wander this way and that around the building and down the block. Thanks for noticing. Yes, no one really knows what this is line, but still they stand and join in. They all have different hopes for it. Thanks so much!
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Reminds me of the cold war propaganda shots of Soviet bread queues.
Clever piece of writing.
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I’m not aware of the propaganda of Soviet bread queues. You have me intrigued. Thanks so much, Mick.
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Is this where you get an Apple Watch? I can only assume there are people living in tents at the front of the line.
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I’m surprised by all the excitement for the Apple Watch, Russell. Who needs to wear a watch anymore? I guess it can make phone calls. Wait, who does that anymore? I suppose it’s always handy to have a tent in your car. You never know when you might need it.
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I looked at the pic, read the story, scratched my head, returned to the pic, frowned, looked again, and the light bulb came on, then I smiled … which means I didn’t see the line of people! Pic seems very European to me. Back to your story … I like it … cerebral … makes on think … and love the format.
PS: Maybe … just maybe, my fictional story could appear next week.
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I believe the pic is from Barcelona. So, I believe you are right in it being European. It’s all about what you see, Frank. If you wrote this story, you might see something entirely different. I went to the line very naturally. Thank you. Oh, goody! I can’t wait. I look forward to your story.
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Haven’t been to Barcelona, but hope to because those who have seem to love it. Just looked at the pic again, but I don’t recall my first impression of this pic.
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That’s ok, Frank. It’s not a test or anything. I usually get a muddled first impression myself. 🙂
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Ooohhh… you gonna play, too, Frank?
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Oh no … not Friday Fictioneers … just a story, something that I haven’t done before. Amy has encouraged me for some time, so an idea came to mind a few months ago, wrote it, and it’s in the queue waiting to be scheduled.
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Oh lovely! Looking forward to reading it!
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It could be this week. Good morning Dale! 🙂
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Morning, my friend!
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You must have had a busy day … I can tell because you missed the May post.
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I’m behind too, Frank. I need to get caught up.
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A monumental task … practically impossible .. but good luck.
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BTW … Possible … the short story could appear either Monday or Wednesday evening … 6:30 pm (your time)
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Yay! I have something to look forward to , Frank. Thanks!
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🙂 … and all is all on track for one of them. I will say that the topic won’t surprise you. 🙂
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It’s in my “to read” pile! 😉 There was a bit of running around, true. Plus, it is gorgeous today so I wanted to get as much gardening done as possible. That means DO NO TURN ON COMPUTER… Otherwise, before I know it, two hours have gone, POOF! Just like that… 😛 Now that I am back from my niece’s animation screening (damn, she’s good) I will sit down with a cuppa and read my backlog… See you soon.
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Good for you … I was gone much of the day too … and on my over for your latest.
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Great take on the prompt Amy, abstract, poetic, beautiful.
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Thank you, Sandra. So happy you liked it. Thanks for those nice comments.
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I liked it, Amy. Yes, one wonders where that line goes. It reminds me of the line we encountered to get through customs in the Miami Airport last Christmas. It wrapped around and through the entire huge baggage claim area and we couldn’t find the end of it. Bizarre!
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Oh, wow! Cathy, that does sound bizarre! Imagine if the line had no end? I like that premise. Thanks, Cathy.
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Great take on the prompt. Well done.
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Thanks so much!
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We British love queues. It’s what we do. Endlessly.
Cool take on the prompt this week!
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You think going electronic would eliminate queues, but no? I guess then you only have an appointment to wait, in some cases. It does seem endless! There’s always a queue somewhere. Thanks, Ali. Glad you liked it.
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I totally agree with KT. It made me smile that no one really knew what they were lined up for. Made me anxious, the way all lines do, at how long it was. Well done.
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I like that you smiled at that. Alicia, standing in the wrong line for hours would be bad enough, but if everyone were clueless, yikes! I was going for the idea of extra length here. 🙂 Thanks.
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I think I’ve been in that line. Or was it another… ? They all look the same and when you get there, it’s the wrong line.
Really thought provoking piece; we spend so much time waiting for someone else to serve us. Or to not give us a job
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That’s true, Patrick. All lines have that same look and feel. I just know I don’t want to get in them. And to be in the wrong line…what a nightmare. It feels like you’ve been punished. We do wait for people to serve us even in this age of do-it-yourself self-sufficiency. Now we have to wait AND do it ourselves! Thanks!
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if it’s worth the wait, it must be damn good. that’s all i can say to that. 🙂
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Let’s hope so, Plaridel. 🙂 If not, there’s going to be a whole lot of crying going on.
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Great take on the prompt! I feel like I’m waiting, but I’m not sure for what ….
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Thanks! Exactly…waiting for what? That would be a nightmare, especially if you couldn’t find the end of the line.
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Dear Amy, I always pick the slowest line at a store and I don’t see things changing. Good story! Nan
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That happens to me, too, Nan. Thanks. I’m glad you liked it. I know it’s a bit different this week.
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I love this, Amy! Totally original and yes, abstract, and yet, isn’t that exactly what it feels like sometimes? Standing in the wrong queue for the wrong thing… LOVE!
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Thank you, Dale! I’m so pleased you enjoyed it. Standing in the wrong line is the Universe playing tricks on you.
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As I stood in line at the Canadian version of the DMV to pay my overdue driver’s licence… Thankfully there was only one place to go!
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The DMV can be the absolute worst. I’m glad you were in the right line!
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I like your piece and I like how anxious it made all of the readers. Everyone gets anxious over lines, it’s universal, and you made it obvious.
Just wanted you to know that I’ve been thinking about you and your loss. It’s hard but it gets better. The anniversary of my Dad’s death is in 2 days. It always opens a small fresh wound.
Be well,
Tracey
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Thanks so much, Tracey. Wishing you well and thinking about you these next days. I hope you can focus on memories that make you smile. Take care.
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Somehow I have these nightmares about undefined lines.. Really you captured that unsettling feeling of and endless queue…
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An undefined line would be a nightmare. I think so, too. Thank you, Bjorn.
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I think I’d learn to swim just to get out of such a line.
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That might be the best strategy, Alice. Maybe the only way!
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When you lose your place in the line you lose your chance at… work, fun, tickets… life? I love this, great take on the prompt.
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I guess it’s best to stay in line or else….? Thank you. So glad you enjoyed it!
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Fiction chugs on a bottle filled with poetry. As it should! Well done Amy.
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Thanks, Trent! Good to see you. I’ve been wondering about you. Hope you’re well!
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All good, Amy, just hibernating. Bad winter and all.
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Good. I hope you get some sunshine soon! Already too hot here, if you can believe it. 🙂
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Amy, this rocks!! I love the mesmerizing pace and wordplay. It’s very visual in the way you pull the reader along… playful words and poetic flow. Love it!
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Thanks so much for those delightful comments. You’re so good to me. 🙂 I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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Nicely done, Amy. Lines can be scary and intimidating. They can also be fun and a little bit tricky. I stood in line the other day to bring my niece some handmade vegan doughnuts that have gotten rave reviews. Others in the line didn’t even know what they were lining up for but figured if the line went out the door and down the street it must be for something terrific. In all honesty they were worth it.
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That’s so funny that others stood in line when they didn’t know what the line was. I can say that I’ve never done that! But just maybe I would if I smelled donuts! I’m so glad they were worth it, Michelle. Yay!
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You have to queue everywhere these days, even on the telephone. That’s why I hate crowds. Well done Amy. I almost felt as though I was in that queue. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne
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I don’t care much for crowds either, because where there’s crowds, there’s lines! What a nice compliment, Suzanne. Thank you. 🙂
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The only good line is at the grocery check out. I get to read all the trashy news.
This was so funny, Amy 🙂 Imaginative take.
Ellespeth
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True, so true. Well, what else is there to do in line when the trashy news is staring at you? Ha. This is where I get all my news, Ellespeth. Thank you!
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I so enjoyed this. I especially like how it looks like a line.
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Thanks, Melanie. Great, that’s what I was going for!
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