Aside

The Line Starts Here?

No there.

It wraps

around the building,

through an alley,

down the block,

on top of the telephone wire,

under a tunnel,

out a window,

and into a pond of—

Like a line at Disneyland.

The beanie hat shakes his head. This is for concert tickets.

No, it’s jobs. The government promised.

A little girl licks her lollipop.

It’s for the Ferris wheel, mama said.

Like a ride at Disneyland, but this thing ain’t moving, no how.

A line from hell.

You wait for the wheel in the line from hell.

A pond, you say?

You know

I

can’t

swim.

********************

(100 words)

PHOTO PROMPT – © Dee Lovering

********************

A little more on the abstract side this week. This is my contribution to Friday Fictioneers, a challenge to write a 100-word story based on a photo. What do you see in the photo? Why not give it a try?

My title is sort of part of my story, otherwise I’m exactly at 100 words. I think you can make it work.

Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting and to Dee Lovering for this week’s photo.

You can check out more stories from the Fictioneers HERE.

 

Advertisements

The Line Starts Here? – Friday Fictioneers

70 thoughts on “The Line Starts Here? – Friday Fictioneers”

  2. I read once that people (on average) spend 6 months of their lives queuing. I blame those Apple fans for blowing it out for the rest of us.

    I like this – it reads like a poem and seems to go longer than you expect (like a queue :)). I also liked the fact there is no obvious purpose to the queue – people seem to be joining simply because others are in it.

    Nicely done.
    KT

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. KT, I’m not surprised by that number of six months for queuing. Your thoughts make me smile. This is exactly what I was going for! Yes, I wanted my words to wander this way and that around the building and down the block. Thanks for noticing. Yes, no one really knows what this is line, but still they stand and join in. They all have different hopes for it. Thanks so much!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

    1. I’m surprised by all the excitement for the Apple Watch, Russell. Who needs to wear a watch anymore? I guess it can make phone calls. Wait, who does that anymore? I suppose it’s always handy to have a tent in your car. You never know when you might need it.

      Like

      Reply

  5. I looked at the pic, read the story, scratched my head, returned to the pic, frowned, looked again, and the light bulb came on, then I smiled … which means I didn’t see the line of people! Pic seems very European to me. Back to your story … I like it … cerebral … makes on think … and love the format.

    PS: Maybe … just maybe, my fictional story could appear next week.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. I believe the pic is from Barcelona. So, I believe you are right in it being European. It’s all about what you see, Frank. If you wrote this story, you might see something entirely different. I went to the line very naturally. Thank you. Oh, goody! I can’t wait. I look forward to your story.

      Like

      Reply

      1. Haven’t been to Barcelona, but hope to because those who have seem to love it. Just looked at the pic again, but I don’t recall my first impression of this pic.

        Like

      1. Oh no … not Friday Fictioneers … just a story, something that I haven’t done before. Amy has encouraged me for some time, so an idea came to mind a few months ago, wrote it, and it’s in the queue waiting to be scheduled.

        Liked by 1 person

      11. It’s in my “to read” pile! 😉 There was a bit of running around, true. Plus, it is gorgeous today so I wanted to get as much gardening done as possible. That means DO NO TURN ON COMPUTER… Otherwise, before I know it, two hours have gone, POOF! Just like that… 😛 Now that I am back from my niece’s animation screening (damn, she’s good) I will sit down with a cuppa and read my backlog… See you soon.

        Liked by 2 people

  7. I liked it, Amy. Yes, one wonders where that line goes. It reminds me of the line we encountered to get through customs in the Miami Airport last Christmas. It wrapped around and through the entire huge baggage claim area and we couldn’t find the end of it. Bizarre!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. You think going electronic would eliminate queues, but no? I guess then you only have an appointment to wait, in some cases. It does seem endless! There’s always a queue somewhere. Thanks, Ali. Glad you liked it.

      Like

      Reply

    1. I like that you smiled at that. Alicia, standing in the wrong line for hours would be bad enough, but if everyone were clueless, yikes! I was going for the idea of extra length here. 🙂 Thanks.

      Like

      Reply

  11. I think I’ve been in that line. Or was it another… ? They all look the same and when you get there, it’s the wrong line.
    Really thought provoking piece; we spend so much time waiting for someone else to serve us. Or to not give us a job

    Like

    Reply

    1. That’s true, Patrick. All lines have that same look and feel. I just know I don’t want to get in them. And to be in the wrong line…what a nightmare. It feels like you’ve been punished. We do wait for people to serve us even in this age of do-it-yourself self-sufficiency. Now we have to wait AND do it ourselves! Thanks!

      Like

      Reply

  15. I love this, Amy! Totally original and yes, abstract, and yet, isn’t that exactly what it feels like sometimes? Standing in the wrong queue for the wrong thing… LOVE!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

      1. As I stood in line at the Canadian version of the DMV to pay my overdue driver’s licence… Thankfully there was only one place to go!

        Liked by 1 person

  16. I like your piece and I like how anxious it made all of the readers. Everyone gets anxious over lines, it’s universal, and you made it obvious.
    Just wanted you to know that I’ve been thinking about you and your loss. It’s hard but it gets better. The anniversary of my Dad’s death is in 2 days. It always opens a small fresh wound.
    Be well,
    Tracey

    Like

    Reply

  19. When you lose your place in the line you lose your chance at… work, fun, tickets… life? I love this, great take on the prompt.

    Like

    Reply

  22. Nicely done, Amy. Lines can be scary and intimidating. They can also be fun and a little bit tricky. I stood in line the other day to bring my niece some handmade vegan doughnuts that have gotten rave reviews. Others in the line didn’t even know what they were lining up for but figured if the line went out the door and down the street it must be for something terrific. In all honesty they were worth it.

    Like

    Reply

    1. That’s so funny that others stood in line when they didn’t know what the line was. I can say that I’ve never done that! But just maybe I would if I smelled donuts! I’m so glad they were worth it, Michelle. Yay!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  23. You have to queue everywhere these days, even on the telephone. That’s why I hate crowds. Well done Amy. I almost felt as though I was in that queue. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Like

    Reply

Take it away.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Cancel

Connecting to %s