It’s time for Friday Fictioneers, a writing group, hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Thanks to her as always for her time and leadership. Thank you to Mary Shipman for this week’s fascinating photo.
The objective is to write a 100-word story based on the photo prompt. All are welcome to participate. My story follows.
(99 words)
Unmentionables
The slip hung in her mother’s closet in the corner behind her work clothes. Serena never saw her mother wear it, but detected the scent of her lilac perfume. Threading her arms into familiar straps, silk brushed against her face as mountains of fabric cascaded around her.
Its delicate sheerness on her skin transported her into the land of grownups; the unmentionables, discretion, assumptions, and that look across the table at dinner. She tried it on for size in the mirror.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“Nothing, mama.”
Still, the slip would be in the same spot. Waiting.
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For more stories from the Fictioneers, click here.
Oooo I want to know what special occasion it was being kept for, all children want to dress up as their parents and grow ups. A lovely piece Amy
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I think it’s a permanent part of her closet. Her little not so hidden hiding place. Thanks so much, Laurie.
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What an interesting (and a bit creepy) picture. I love where you took it.
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Isn’t it interesting?! I’ve never seen anything like it. I’m sure there are some great stories out of it. Happy you like mine. I couldn’t seem to go anywhere else at the moment. 🙂 Thanks, Carrie.
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Beautiful, Amy. So much depth. You took me back to my childhood and playing dress-up with this. I would sneak into my parent’s room to sit at my mom’s vanity and get into her make-up and perfume as well! But then, what little girl didn’t do stuff like that? We all have our secret stories of wanting to grow up too soon, right?!
Hope all is well! xo
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Thank you, Kelly! It seems as though most kids do this. I guess what might differ is the mom’s reaction. I feel like my mom never knew, but she must have! I’ve probably forgotten is more like it. Everything is good. Sick kids, but other than that…fine. Hope everything is peachy with you, too. xoxo
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Sorry to hear your boys are sick… hope they feel better soon, and hope you have a nice weekend. Just dropped my son off at the bus for a regatta in Chicago this weekend, but we aren’t going. Everything is good, though! xoxo
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Good to hear! Everyone is on the mend here now. 🙂
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Oh good – glad to hear that! 🙂
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Oh no … possible that the little girl doesn’t want to know what mom is up to with that slip.
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The little girl has definitely crossed into her personal space, Frank. Thanks.
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Ohhhhh, very nice! I love the part about the “grownups” being mentioned. She’ll wear that slip one day, more like “earn” it.
Way to go, Amy! Five out of five garter belts. 😉
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Whohoo! Five out of five garter belts! Thanks, Kent. Glad you liked my story.
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Thanks, Amy. Always a pleasure.
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Great descriptions of a kid playing dress up though an awareness of the adult world might be creeping in.
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Thank you, Subroto. That’s a good way to put it…the adult world creeping in. I guess it happens sooner or later.
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A nice little tale of a child’s exploration that remains completely separate from a whole different world. Nice one, Amy!
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Thank you, Tom. Thanks for the lovely comments. 🙂
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“the unmentionables, discretion, assumptions, and that look across the table at dinner” – that’s a lovely rendition of a child’s view of the adult world
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Thank you, Neil. What a lovely comment.
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Nice description of a child eagerly wondering what it’s like to be “all grown up”.
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I think there is that period where you wonder about the grown up life and then….you’re there…and you want to be a kid again. Thanks, Ali.
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With one sentence, that mom gave me the creeps.
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Right. You are so observant, Trent. She could have said anything else or even nothing. That would have been better. But the little girl will go the grownup route, pretend she didn’t hear it and do what she wants.
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Dear Amy,
I liked the feel of this story. It brings back memories of playing dress up. My mom had the a full red petticoat that was my favorite. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle, a red petticoat. My goodness! That’s a memorable item. Mine was this purple number. I don’t think my mom knew I discovered it. Thank you.
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She’s growing up. She’s cute now; soon there will be fireworks.
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It sure seems like it, Patrick. She seems to be in some kind of hurry. Thanks!
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You created a great visual image here, Amy. Our granddaughters just love to dress up and the allure of something forbidden has magnetic pull all it’s own.
Five out of five garter belts from me too.
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The forbidden is enticing enough. Never mind what it looks like, right? Thanks, Russell and thank you for the garter belt love. 🙂
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I love the way you describe the land of grownups – “the unmentionables, discretion, assumptions, and that look across the table at dinner.”
Perfect, Amy. And a really interesting photo.
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Missy, good to see you! Thank you. The land of grownups is such a mystery when you’re young. Such an innocent time. Isn’t it interesting? I’m wondering what this photo is all about.
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So much to think about here in the relationship between mother and daughter. Well penned. Mike
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I know I kind of left it open. Mother doesn’t want her messing with her stuff, that part is clear. Thank you, Mike.
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Nice one, Amy! Sounds like she crossed the line, however…
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Thank you, Cathy. Yeah, just a bit…
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Such a tender moment for a young girl. You’ve really captured it, Amy!
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Aww, a tender moment. Thanks for that, Dawn. Glad you liked it.
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This triggers some memories! Once, my sister and I were going through old clothes in my grandmother’s attic and we found a super skimpy “flapper” dress from the 1920’s-1930’s (our mother’s teen years). It had spaghetti straps, plunging neckline and rows of fringe at the bottom. We confronted our mom, and gleefully pointed out that there was no way to wear a bra with this dress. Her response was merely to tell us to “put it away now.” 😀😀😀
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Haha! Put it away now. Oh, I can just hear it. I bet she didn’t want anyone to touch her stuff and it must be a precious memory she didn’t want disturbed. Wow, that must have been something to come across an old flapper dress like that from another era! My mom could do that dance! Thanks for sharing that, Jan.
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Very interesting story,
Would love to read a longer version.
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Thank you. Glad you enjoyed it and want to read more.
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I love the take.. the fantasy of growing up.. like every little girl. and it always terrifies their mums..
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Thanks, Bjorn. Terrifies is a good word to describe it. It’s the unknown where there’s danger.
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Great story Amy! Well done!
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Thanks so much, Courtney. Glad you enjoyed it.
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I love where you took this. Your words describe the girl’s thoughts and feelings as being naive and innocent but just on the brink of the sensual, smelling and feeling but not yet completely understanding what grown-ups are up to with their looks across the dinner table.
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Thanks for all the feedback, Gah, and for your nice comments. That innocence, however short-lived, is such a special thing and doesn’t last long enough. Everyone is in a hurry to grow up. I think girls more so than boys.
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Great story, Amy. It took me back to my childhood (but on one in my family had anything as luxurious and silky as that!) 😀
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Oh, wonderful Dianne. This one applies to me, too. I’m sure it wasn’t anything expensive. 🙂 My family scraped by. I don’t even know how they did it.
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I love the imagery of mountains of fabric cascading.
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Thanks so much, Liz. I reworked that one a few times!
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Good thing your Mom wasn’t Anna Freud. That’ right. You would have tried on a freudian slip.
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Hahaha. Badda boom! You’re such a jokester. My mom could have been Anna Frued. She did work in mental health.
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I have a confession. So did I.
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deliciously mysterious. i wish, i wish, there’s no 100-word limit. 🙂
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Oh, that’s just one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me, Plaridel! Thank you so much. 🙂
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This is a great eyes-of-a-child piece. Lots of potential for a longer work here. Not everyone remembers those deep and confusing feelings children have – you should exploit your talent!
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Thank you so much for the kind words and encouragement. Glad you liked it!
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Very well-written story. Sort of the first part of a coming of age piece for a child not ready to come of age. Really good!
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Wow, thanks so much for the compliments, Perry. I appreciate that! You got it. She’s not ready. I’m glad you enjoyed it.
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Hi, I have nominated you for a quotation challenge. The information follows: https://charlesfrenchonwordsreadingandwriting.wordpress.com/2016/05/02/3-days-quotation-challenge-day-3/
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Thanks, Charles! I’ll see what I come up with.
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The kids notice everything don’t they? including the looks across the table? Great descriptions from a child’s perspective.
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Thank you, Ansumani. I’m glad that bit stood out. Kids are always watching. 🙂
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That so took me back, Amy, and you captured those forbidden moments beautifully. Well done.
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Thanks so much, Sandra. I’m particularly fond of the forbidden. 🙂
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You took me to that place where slipping that on just made you feel…..
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Exactly! Thanks, Dawn.
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It seems puberty has struck and the slip makes her feel more grown up. Good descriptions, Amy. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Clothes can do that for a person. Now, if I could just find that item of clothing that makes me feel young…Thanks, Suzanne. 🙂
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Children like to play grownups!
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They sure do! Thanks for the visit.
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What a beautiful story. The descriptions and sensory details made me feel as though I had landed right in the story.
I loved these lines:
“Threading her arms into familiar straps, silk brushed against her face as mountains of fabric cascaded around her.
Its delicate sheerness on her skin transported her into the land of grownups; the unmentionables, discretion, assumptions, and that look across the table at dinner.”
Perfectly rendered images!
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You’re so kind!! Your comments made my day. Thanks for taking the time to offer you thoughts. So happy you enjoyed my story!
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:-). It’s my pleasure, entirely.
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