Santa and Friends: The Real Story Beyond the Lights

Looking at all the colorful lights and holiday displays you would probably say everything is going splendidly. But I promise you, things are not always as they seem. I felt a lot of anxiety in the air as I drove through my neighborhood. Maybe Santa and friends are anxious about the big night. Could be. I don’t know, but I got an earful as I drove by their happy, smiling, sometimes tipped over bodies. This is what I heard. This is the real story:

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Why do they always put us on top of the roof? I don’t know why, but I feel a bit distant, forgotten, like they don’t care. Can anyone even see us here? Is anyone looking? Hey you, down there. We’re up here. Just keep waving.

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That’s on TOP of the roof…Up on the housetop reindeer pause, Out jumps Good Old Santa Claus…ring any bells? They make my life so difficult.

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What are they doing putting all three of us together like this? It confuses the kids. They already see us at all the malls. I say on 3, we scramble. Ready: 1 -2- 3…

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There! That ought to do it. They won’t have a clue now.

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Wipe that smile off your face, Prancer. You think you’re special because you can fly. Lend a hoof why don’t you? And take that wreath off. It’s only going to slow you down and it looks ridiculous.

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Santa, you know I would help if I could…and even if I could, I can walk too good. I’d probably slow you down. I certainly can’t fly, just so you know.

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No one thinks I’m a snowman. No one is buying this. Whatever is this prickly, brown material I sit on? Where is the snow?

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If my photo wasn’t so blurry, you could see that I’m a beautiful peacock. I’m the one that isn’t that obnoxious red or green color. I have nothing to do with the holidays, but I am the best looking thing on this lawn. I’m marvelous, darling.

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We’re already working double shifts at the park over the holidays and now we have to work the neighborhoods, too.
Mickey, I don’t think I can hold on to this package a second longer.
You can do it, Minnie. Just think, soon we’ll deflate and we’ll be touching again.

I must be losing it…I hope you enjoyed that holiday cheer! I’ll be stepping away from my blog until next year. Please enjoy your holiday and be safe.

Wishing you a bright and merry holiday 
and peace, love and happiness for the New Year 2016!! 

With Love,
Amy

Weekly Photo Challenge: From Every Angle

This week’s photo challenge is to capture a stationary object or person from different angles, and to present them in a gallery.

I chose my hanging chandelier, oh ahem…a light. It’s quite modest to be called a chandelier. I tried from side, bottom and top. Yes, I was standing on the table. Enjoy!

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For more angles, please visit the Weekly Photo Challenge site.

Drama Queen – Friday Fictioneers

Drama Queen

Offstage:

“It’s the director’s wife’s sister’s husband,” the stagehand said, whispering into the mic of his headset.

“No, it’s the brother of the director’s wife,” a voice answered.

“No.”

“Yes.”

Onstage:

The leading lady begins.

“Love is…

She throws her shawl on the floor

“…a slow caress…”

Offstage:

“She’s off script again,” said the stagehand.

Onstage:

Thud. Her shoes drop to the floor.

“Her lips on mine…,” she fixates on a woman in the front row.

She slides her dress past her waist, exposing her nipples to the air.

Offstage:

“It’s the director’s wife.”

“Fade to black.”

“Not a chance.”

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A huge thank you to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for leading this pack, and to Kent Bonham for the photo. I love this prompt.

Having been in a few theater productions myself, I think the real drama happens backstage.

I went over a few words, but since some of my words are directional, I hope you’ll allow me a little latitude. (Fixed with Rich’s help. Thanks, Rich!)

Click here for more stories from the Fictioneers.

Genre: Humor (100 words)

Copyright – Kent Bonham

 

 

 

 

A Festivus* Time: Santa Came to Town

*Festivus (i.e., this post may have Festivus hints)

‘Twas two weeks before Christmas, when all through the house I was a reading a book because books relax me.

Our tree still not up, nor stockings hung, but we still had hope that Santa Claus soon will be here.

Our kittens were nestled all snug in their beds, while we were still eating dinner.

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When outside the house, came sirens, blue and red, and wailing

So loud, the kitties wake, and we run outside.

When, what to our wondering eyes did appear,

Five cop cars, two fire trucks, all dressed in bling lights.

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Behind them, a sleigh, a little old driver, and eight tiny reindeer.

“It’s Santa Claus,” exclaimed my children.

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Collecting canned goods and unwrapped toys.

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All for the little ones, Christmas joys.

Ho ho ho who wouldn’t go…we all did. It was fun!

This is a tradition in our town when the police and fire department get together to give Santa Claus a full escort through all the neighborhoods in the city. Santa takes pictures with kids and tosses candy canes. I was excited in spite of the fact that I didn’t get a candy cane this year. The city provides a calendar announcing when they will be arriving in your neighborhood, but I do not look because I like to be surprised. This is the seventh year in this neighborhood and, once again, I was surprised. I think, Wow, what are all those sirens!

Do you have traditions in your city or neighborhood? Please share. These things make life rich and memorable, don’t you think?