Let’s Talk Twitteresque

There, I made up a new phrase. Twitteresque. I have no idea what it means. I just like the way it sounds, and if I like it, you might like it too. I’m adopting the “Effortless” approach. You may recall I used the Social Effort Scale last week, which determined that I “try too hard” on Twitter…even though most of my activity was said to be in the “Effortless” category.

According to the feedback on individual tweets, replying with a simple, “Thanks, that’s cool!” gets a “Not Trying Hard Enough” score. However, if you add a hashtag, you may find yourself in the “Effortless” category after all. Fair enough, but doesn’t that require more effort? Just an observation.

But I got to thinking about what “Effortless” look like on Twitter, and by that I mean what does it look like on the screen? I’ve come to this conclusion. Those who do effortless best look like they don’t give a shit. The guy that rolls out of bed, half-dressed, half-asleep and says something clever like, “I don’t want to get up today….” That gets retweeted 1,027 times. I think you know what I mean.

Of course, nobody does “Effortless” better than celebrities. They probably don’t want to be on Twitter in the first place. Let’s take a look see.

Here are a few famous writers. Now, I know Stephen King finally resigned and opened a Twitter account, but I think he’s enjoying himself.

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No big introductions here. Just Stephen King in a cool skeleton-with-a-guitar shirt. It’s all you need. Maybe the comfortable, scary approach would work for me. This is rock star cool.

And Neil Gaiman:

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More deep cool, and cool enough to drink milk. My husband had a glass of red wine with him once. True story. Where was I? How come I didn’t get to have a glass of wine with him. Now I’m getting upset.

Speaking of wine, here’s Leo enjoying a glass:

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Check out those stats. My husband says Leo follows him and even retweeted him once. Oh, sure. I’m a bit skeptical now that I see the smallish number of people that he follows, also typical of celebrities. Grumpy Cat, or some version of him, followed me. I do have that! Anyway, cheers to Leo’s 11.8M followers.

Perhaps, I should be drinking something in my profile picture. Just a thought.

And here’s someone who needs no introduction at all and only one name.

oprahtwitter

Just the one name identifier and the dogs. Lots of fluffy dogs.

Here’s her friend Ellen with a catchy intro:

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Her tweets…she’s referring to the episode in Seinfeld, of course, when Elaine is in the spa, telling a woman that her boobs are real and that “…they’re spectacular.” Boobs, there. I got that in. Boobs! WordPress suggested I should write more about boobs this year in my posts. That worked out well for

me, and…that was effortless. Look at that.

So, Ellen got the flu from her friend Oprah. I’m sure you’ve all heard about it by now. It was big news on Twitter and Ellen was proud to get the flu from her. Favorited more than two thousand times. Let’s celebrate the flu, and why shouldn’t we?

Here’s another one of Oprah’s friend. Mr. Neil Patrick Harris. Incredible in Gone Girl. Did you see him? I thought he was excellent. He deserves some kind of prize.

NPHtwitter

Act some…you mean since you were four or something? Variety acts…you mean like the Academy Awards? See, effortless. And I will add, humble. And Oprah is here, and not even listed in the “Followed by” list. She’s just hanging out there. It just struck me as funny is all. Not funny?

This has been an edition of “Let’s Talk Twitteresque.” Your takeaway is simply this: If you want to appear effortless on Twitter, just be famous. Got it?

What about you? Ever had a glass of wine with a celebrity? Are you drinking a beverage in your profile pic? Have you ever had any interaction with a celebrity on Twitter? Please share.

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“E” is for Effortless

Last week, I was Effortless in Twitter. I checked out this tool called the Social Effort Scale that measures your effort in social media; they can measure your profile in Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.

I had achieved a score of 150 in Twitter, which is a score of Effortless. Go me! This week, I stumbled. Here’s my latest score:

But my Effortless marks are still high! I scored bonus points for sharing Neil Gaiman's tweet.
But my Effortless marks are still high! I scored bonus points for sharing Neil Gaiman’s tweet. Ignore Facebook.

Your score is based on the following:

  • Number of hashtags
  • Percentage of capital letters
  • Amount of emoticons
  • Exclamation marks
  • Punctuation

The resulting score gives you an overall view of how hard or how little you’re trying on social media, plus individual scores for each of your updates. Here’s some advice for an Effortless score: Don’t ever mention yourself (even in a link), keep exclamation marks and hashtags to a minimum, and don’t use capital letters. I repeat, do NOT use capital letters. And, if you retweet someone with lots of capitals, down you go. Or, in this case, up.

Trust me, I don’t take this too seriously, but I’ll admit I got excited when I got the “Effortless” score. Typically, I know I try “too hard.” A visit to a tarot card reader came to mind. It was many moons ago, and a friend suggested it after we walked past the tarot card reader’s window. After turning over the first tarot card, she took hold of my hands, and simply said, “You try too hard.” Maybe it was because I had PMS or that I was planning a wedding on little money, but I broke down and cried. I knew she was right, and it wasn’t what I wanted to hear. I really don’t know what I was expecting. A “How-to Guide” to life? Rainbows? I just didn’t like what she was serving.

My wedding plans had gone haywire; no one was performing their role as I saw fit, asking the wrong questions because they weren’t about me. They didn’t worry about the same things that I did, and believe me I worried; I wrestled with each decision until I could bear the weight of it no longer and released it to fate, a sort of passive-aggressive approach to decision-making. Sometimes it worked, but most of the time I second-guessed my decisions, or lack of decisions, anyway. Oh, how agonizing I was.

Little did I know at the time that I was marrying “The River.” It’s taken me a long time to embrace my husband’s “Que Sera Sera” approach to life. Now perk up. Here’s when my post will take a decidedly more cheerful turn. Enter “The River.”

I thought a visual might help. Feel the flow of the river...
I thought a visual might help. Feel the flow…

Let me tell you a more recent story of my husband’s ability to be “The River.” My husband registered for a conference for Union Educators in Los Angeles, one that required travel and hotel arrangements. He signed up at the last minute, and when he received an itinerary, he simply made a mental note of his travel date and that he would leave for the airport right after work. He never knew the time of the flight, his airline, or the name of his hotel. All that he knew was that he needed to arrive at the airport, which he did, ticketless, of course. Luckily he remembered his I.D., and the airline figured out the rest.

He had hoped he might see a colleague on the plane he knew; he saw no one. So, there he is up in the sky on his way to his conference, having no idea whatsoever where he would go once the plane landed, besides getting his luggage at the carousel. (It’s important to not get too ahead of yourself when you are The River. One step at a time.) At the carousel, who does he see, but the Union President. Oh, what luck! The President ushers him into a shuttle; it’s doubtful my husband expressed any confusion about their next destination. It was now in the hands of the Union President; what better person to run into? Did I mention that the Union President’s flight was delayed, so that it was a complete fluke that my husband should run into him at all? Double luck.

And it continues….

The hotel overbooked the “packaged deal” assigned for his group. Not to worry. There’s an available room in the penthouse. And guess what? My husband is bumped up to the penthouse with a slick view of the city and a balcony! Here, room service delivered free breakfast each and every morning; no phones calls necessary. Unbelievable!

I laugh at this, but then I also think it probably would not have happened this way if I were with him on this trip. I would have stressed, and consequently, caused him stress. We probably never would have ended up in the penthouse.

You have to ask yourself how willing you are to embrace the flow of the river, to indulge in oblivious forgetfulness, to just be in the moment…to be effortless.

Of course, by asking, you defeat the whole purpose of being The River altogether. It’s really a life philosophy and one that is not easily mastered.

I sense that a bigger part of it is letting go of self-absorption and being aware of others first. By letting go, the world around you is invited into your life, and just maybe they will set it on a smoother course. If you’ve broken all your New Year resolutions already, you might try the effortless route. You may be better off. You may even end up in the penthouse.

What about you? What end of the spectrum do you fall…The River or on the side of worry and indecision?

photo credit: Jezz via photopin cc

Striking a Pose in the Twitterverse

You heard that right. I’ve struck a pose in the Twitterverse. Twitterville. Twiiterland. Land of Tweets. Oh, I guess we could just say Twitter. Yep, I finally took the plunge.

How I currently see Twitter.
How I currently see Twitter.

I owe my thanks to Jon of Jumping from Cliffs and his lovely post, How to Win at Twitter in 7 Easy Steps. Only 7 steps? AND I can win? Yes! I couldn’t pass this up. Jon has all sorts of good advice. You really should follow his blog if you don’t already.

Now, I am properly feathered. Now I know, for example, that I should NOT be spammy. That’s perfect. Hate that stuff. And to tweet, retweet and such.

Also, the importance of the bio cannot be overstated. I thought up the following bios for myself:

I suck at this. Won’t you please help me?

That might give the wrong impression. No? Well how about this, because less is more on Twitter:

She’s lost. Help her? 

Seriously, I did come up with something else, which I’ll probably change tomorrow, regardless of the notion, according to some in the know, that no one cares. Okay, that would be my husband who said this. I suppose after thousands of followers, maybe.

Still working on the “sprucing up” part. You’re my friends, so I know you won’t hold this against me, right? I included the blue flamingo in my banner because “Blue Flamingo” used to be my nickname when I danced in this dance theater group. This is how is came about:

Dancer: Amy, you will be a flamingo.

Me: Okay, but I don’t want to be pink.

Dancer: Then you will be blue.

There you have it! It worked for me, because I like blue. I was the Blue Flamingo for a bit. There was also a Giraffe.

I’ll admit that I’m slow to adopt the social media since I’ve never considered myself to be a Me Me person. I’m not saying you are. It’s just that whenever I think about social media, generally, it’s all about Me and Look at me. I said, LOOK at me. LOOK at ME, ME. Meeeee. Are you still looking at me, because I don’t feel that you are? How can I say this any other way. LOOK AT ME!! LOOK LOOK!! I’m not trying to exaggerate.

And now with DeepFace, oh help us all. A missing airplane and now this.

Actually, Twitter looks to be a fun, informative place, and as the ever so gracious Guapo revealed, “a wicked (fun) timesuck! And then I responded, and he favorited my tweet. I got very excited about that!

Oh, and Tipsy Lit favorited my comment, even welcomed me. They are a class act.

And on Day two, thanks to Carrie for the warm welcome.

Now I can follow Stephen King and Neil Gaiman. I always wanted to do that.

And you. I want to follow you! I have followed some of my friends here in a very random, haphazard manner. So, if you reach out to me, I promise I’ll be following you back.

I’m @amyreesewrites
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Meet you at the pond!

My inquiring mind wants to know: Do you have any Twitter tips for me? Do you have recommendations on who to follow? Any celebrities you enjoy?  Is Twitter a big timesuck? What isn’t a big timesuck these days? I need answers. 

photo credit: sinkdd via photopin cc